HAPPINESS IS A DECISION!

We have been sold on the idea that happiness is a goal, a destination…that it is out there, outside and needs to be found, reached or acquired. We have been told that if we read, study, work, have a family, and acquire material things, we will be happy. But somehow, we are not. Most of us have tasted happiness temporarily on occasions when we have had some new or repeated desired experiences like falling or being in love, acquiring a car or a home, getting married, having a child, going on vacation, getting a job promotion, doing something exciting, etc.; or sometimes when our health, finances, work, and relationships are going well. But happiness somehow keeps being elusive. Sometimes we are happy, sometimes we are not. It seems to be always one step ahead. Most of us have felt it but we do not live it constantly. The problem is that virtues like love, happiness, peace, joy and so on do not reside outside of us, cannot be found or acquired, and are not a goal or a destination. They are a decision!

There was once a Zen Buddhist Master, who was always happy, positive, with a smile and of a good disposition. His students were surprised of how happy he always was so they once asked him how he could be so joyful all the time. The master said, “every morning, before I get up, I ask myself one question: do I want to be happy or miserable today? What I live daily is the answer to that question. That simple!”

Most people confuse being excited or passionate about something in life, being surrounded by good circumstances (i.e., health, finances, family or love, etc.), being wealthy and able to afford things, having good quality relationships, etc. with being happy. These may give you a temporary feeling of happiness even if it lasts a few hours, days, months or years. But this is not happiness. Happiness cannot be temporary. True happiness is permanent and does not depend on the external circumstances. Otherwise, it cannot be happiness because sooner or later one or more of these elements (your health, finances, knowledge, relationships, or etc.) will not be there. It is just a matter of time. In other words, if your happiness depends on something outside of yourself, you can only be happy temporarily and will suffer all your life.

Like in the Zen Buddhist Master story, happiness is not a goal or a destination, it is a decision! You either want to be happy and decide to be happy, or you don’t. Deciding to be happy is the first step and probably the hardest, just because it is hard to get to this decision when your senses are so overstimulated and overwhelmed with so much stimulus coming from everywhere around you and the amount of misinformation that is being given to us all the time through education, books, magazines, news, media, etc. Once the decision is made, once you realize that it is a decision, then you have a chance, but to really get there, you must work at it every single moment of your life. Just making the decision is not enough. You have to work at it all the time! The same applies to all the other virtues like love, peace, joy, bliss, ecstasy, etc.

But happiness cannot happen by itself. It needs a few other ingredients. To be happy, you must be at peace. To be at peace, you must love yourself. To love yourself, you must learn to be what you really are and ‘not what you think people think you are’ or what your family, society, religion, and government want you to be. As you dig deeply inside of you, as you make the commitment to be happy, and as you start working on being happy from the inside out and not from the outside in, your life will change slowly, gradually, and deeply. You will start blossoming!

According to the Zen Buddhist Master, Thich Nhat Hanh, “When we are mindful, deeply in touch with the present moment, our understanding of what is going on deepens, and we begin to be filled with acceptance, joy, peace and love…Around us, life bursts with miracles–a glass of water, a ray of sunshine, a leaf, a caterpillar, a flower, laughter, raindrops. If you live in awareness, it is easy to see miracles everywhere. Each human being is a multiplicity of miracles. Eyes that see thousands of colors, shapes, and forms; ears that hear a bee flying or a thunderclap; a brain that ponders a speck of dust as easily as the entire cosmos; a heart that beats in rhythm with the heartbeat of all beings. When we are tired and feel discouraged by life’s daily struggles, we may not notice these miracles, but they are always there.”

Author: Maurice Correa
Website: pathtoone.com